Those shoes. You know the pair, the ones that pinch and were once kinda cute or sexy or fun.

Yeah, those. The pair that sits in the back of your closet, collecting dust because you won’t wear them anymore because they are uncomfortable at best and downright painful at worst.

Yet you keep them, allowing them to take up valuable real estate in your crowded closet.

These boots are as close as I get to THAT pair of shoes these days — they are great until my feet swell up or I have to walk far or stand for a long time.

“I need them to go with that outfit,” you tell yourself. “I might wear it again (does that outfit even fit anymore???).”

Everytime you think about getting rid of them, you can’t. Everytime you think about wearing them, you find something more comfortable.

I had a job like those shoes. At first, it was fun being the only woman on the team and around most of the tables I found myself at. Once I learned the job and the people involved, I found sharing and getting buy-in for ideas that were not the commonly accepted view to be challenging at best and a fool’s errand when the men around the table were not ready to embrace that there might be more than one way to accomplish our goals.

Eventually, going into the office left me feeling like I was wearing a pair of shoes that didn’t fit quite right anymore – uncomfortable from all the friction that goes with being different from the rest of the team in some way.

When they come to me, the ladies I work with often express frustration born of seeing the world differently than the men they work with, not realizing just how much our collective childhood conditioning impacts us even as adults. I help them recognize and release this conditioning so they are able to connect with and embrace their uniqueness. After working with me, they have the confidence to voice and champion their perspectives, helping to broaden the perspective and strengthen the decision making abilities of their teams.

We all deserve shoes and situations that fit us perfectly – what’s one thing you can do to reduce the friction in your worklife so your job fits you better?

Heal the Leader

Is your job like a pair of fun, sexy shoes…